Article: Quieting the Inner Critic
Published in “I” by Institute for Management Development (IMD)
It’s 3am. Your eyes flick open. Something’s woken you. It’s that voice again: “How could I have been so stupid?” “Why did I say that?” “Why can’t I hold things together?” “I’ll be found out for the idiot I am.” “I can’t do anything right!”
No, it’s not your sleeping partner – it’s coming from inside your head. It’s that unrelenting inner critic who can make life hell. Many of us – successful, balanced managers and leaders – are dogged in our life by an overly judgmental voice that takes up residence, heightened particularly when we’re under stress. It may have been an even more constant companion over the last 12 months of the COVID-19 pandemic: do more, push harder, keep productive, hold it together.
For women it’s often loudest. One reason is that many women are brought up to put others’ needs first, at the expense of their own. And women have generally been asked to do even more during lockdowns and face greater occupational setbacks and hardships for doing so. But in reality, no one is spared: all genders and cultural backgrounds can suffer from a tough inner critic, that can be our own worst enemy. Learning to quieten this internal critic is a crucial skill for your well-being and resilience, and to help you better cope with the ongoing uncertainty that is the ‘new normal’.